1.A Boy with a Big Head

A boy cried to his mother, “All the children make fun of me. They say I have a big head.”　　
“Don‘t listen to them,” his mother said, “You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store to buy twenty pounds of patotoes.”
“Where is the shopping bag?” 　　
“I haven‘t got one-use your hat.”

翻譯：

大頭娃娃

一個(gè)小男孩向他母親哭訴道：“他們都取笑我，說(shuō)我腦袋大。” “別聽(tīng)他們的，”他母親安慰道，“你有一個(gè)很漂亮的腦袋。好啦，別哭了，去商店買(mǎi)十斤土豆來(lái)。” 　　
“購(gòu)物袋在哪兒？” 　　
“沒(méi)購(gòu)物袋了—-就用你的帽子吧。”

2.Blind Date

After being with her all evening, the man couldn‘t take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, “I have some bad news. My grandfather just died.””Thank heavens,” his date replied. “If yours hadn‘t, mine would have had to!”

翻譯：

相親

和盲約對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話(huà)，這樣他就能借故先離開(kāi)了。當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說(shuō)：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕！薄爸x天謝地！”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了！”

 
3.Lawyer and Engineer

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, “I‘m here because my house burned down, and the insurance company paid for everything.”
“That‘s quite a coincidence,” said the engineer. “I‘m here because my house were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything.”
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. “How do you start a flood?” he asked.

翻譯：

律師與工程師

一個(gè)律師與一個(gè)工程師在加勒比海邊釣魚(yú)。律師說(shuō)：“我到這里是因?yàn)槲业姆孔颖淮蠡馃耍ｋU(xiǎn)公司賠償了我所有的損失。”
“這太巧了，”工程師說(shuō)，“我是因?yàn)榉孔颖缓樗疀_垮了，保險(xiǎn)公司也賠償了所有的損失。”
律師看起來(lái)有些困惑，“你是怎么引起洪水的？”他不解的問(wèn)。

 4.A Problem in Arithmetic

Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all of the arithmetic problems in his book easily.
One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruit store. There was a sign in the window which said, “Apple-Six for five cents.” An idea came to Bill and he went into the store. “How much are the apples?” he asked the store.

“Six for five cents.” “But I don‘t want six apples.” “How many apples do you want?” “It is not a question of how many apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic.” “What do you mean by a problem in arithmetic?” asked the man.
“Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worth four cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples are worth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worth nothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you.”
Bill picked out a good apple, began to eat it, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprise that he could not say a word.

翻譯：

數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題

比爾是一個(gè)好學(xué)生，也是個(gè)聰明的孩子。他喜歡學(xué)數(shù)學(xué)，課本上所有的數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題他都能不費(fèi)勁地解答。

有一天，在上學(xué)路上，比爾經(jīng)過(guò)一家水果店。該店窗戶(hù)上有個(gè)招牌上寫(xiě)著：“蘋(píng)果–五美分六個(gè)。”比爾腦筋一轉(zhuǎn)，進(jìn)了店門(mén)。 “蘋(píng)果怎么賣(mài)？” “五美分六個(gè)。” “但我不想要六個(gè)。” “你想要幾個(gè)？” “這不是我想要幾個(gè)的問(wèn)題。這是個(gè)數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題。” “數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題？你說(shuō)這話(huà)是什么意思？”

“你看，如果六個(gè)蘋(píng)果五美分，那么五個(gè)蘋(píng)果四美分，四個(gè)蘋(píng)果三美分，三個(gè)蘋(píng)果二美分，二個(gè)蘋(píng)果一美分，一個(gè)蘋(píng)果就不要錢(qián)。我只要一個(gè)蘋(píng)果，如果一個(gè)蘋(píng)果一分錢(qián)也不要的話(huà)，那我也就沒(méi)必要給你錢(qián)了。”

比爾揀了一個(gè)好蘋(píng)果，開(kāi)始吃了起來(lái)，然后興高采烈地邁出了店門(mén)。那個(gè)售貨員吃驚地望著這個(gè)小男孩，一句話(huà)也說(shuō)不出來(lái)。