1.I‘m the groom
 

A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. “But officer,” the man said, “I can explain.””Just be quiet,” snapped the officer. “I‘m going to

put you in jail until the chief gets back.””But ,officer, I ….””I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!”A few hours later, the officer looked in on his

prisoner and said, “You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter‘s wedding. He‘ll be in a good mood when he gets back.””Are you sure?” answered the man

in the cell. “I‘m the groom.”

翻譯：

我就是新郎

大街上的一個超速駕駛者被警察攔住了。“但是警官”這個人說道，“我可以解釋的”。“保持安靜”，警察突然說道。“我將把你送往監獄，直到長官回來。“但是，警察，我

……”。“我說過了保持安靜，你要到監獄了。”幾小時后，警察向監獄里看了看說道“算你運氣好，因為我們的長官正在他女兒的婚禮上。他將帶著一個愉快的心情回來的。”

“你確定”在牢房里的這個人說道。“我就是新郎呀”。

2.Goethes and critic

Goethes was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said, I‘ll never make way for a fool. But I will, with that Goethe retreated aside.

翻譯：

歌德和評論家

一次，歌德正在魏瑪一個公園的一條狹窄小道上散步，碰巧他遇見一個對他懷有敵意的評論家。兩人都停了下來，彼此相互對視。接著評論家說道：我從來不給傻瓜讓路。 可我給，說完歌德退到了一邊。

 
3.Good Sight

Lawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the sun, and they tell me it‘s about ninety-three million miles away.

翻譯：

良好的視力

律師：你說你離事故現場約有35英尺，你能看清多遠的東西？證人：這么說吧，早上起床后我看見太陽，別人告訴我這大約有9300萬英里遠。

4.a King from a Knave

George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit, Horne Tooke,whether he could play cards.Your Majesty, replied Tooke, I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I

cannot even tell a King from a Knave.

翻譯：

國王和無賴

喬治三世問一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩·圖克，會不會玩紙牌。陛下，圖克回答說：在玩紙牌方面，我只不過是幼兒園的水平。我甚至分不清國王和無賴。