“Flowers need water,” said the teacher. “Water your flowers every day, or they‘ll die.”
 
One morning Mother saw Marry out in the garden and asked, “What are you doing there, Marry?”
 
“Watering flowers,” said Marry.
 
“But it is raining now!”
 
“Oh, it doesn‘t matter. Mum.”

翻譯：

 
“花需要水，” 老師說，“每天給花澆水，否則他們會死掉的”。
 
一天早上，母親看到瑪麗在花園，就問：“瑪麗，你在干嗎？”
 
“ 我在給花澆水?！爆旣惢卮稹?br />  
“可是在下雨?。　?br />  
“哦，沒事媽媽?！?/p>

A little boy bustled（喧鬧，忙亂） into a grocery one day with a memorandum（便箋） in his hand.
 
″Hello, Mr. Smith,″He said, ″I want thirteen pounds of coffee at 33 cents.″
 
″Very good,″ said the grocer, and he noted down the sale.
 
″Anything else, Charlie?″
 
″Yes. Twenty－seven pounds of sugar at 9 cents.″
 
″The loaf? And whatelse?″
 
″Seven and a half pounds of bacon at 30 cents.″
 
″That will be a good brand. Goon.″
 
″Five pounds of tea at 90 cents, eleven and a half quarts of molasses at 8 cents a pint, two eight－pound hams at 31 cents, and five dozen jars of pickled walnuts（核桃） at 34 cents a jar.″
 
The grocer made out the bill.
 
″It‘s a big order,″ he said. ″Did your mother tell you to pay for it？″
 
″My mother,″ said the boy, as he pocketed the neat and accurate bill, ″has nothing to do with this business. It is my arithmetic（算術） lesson and I had to get it done somehow.″（英語笑話帶翻譯 www.fenghuangtongcheng.cn）

翻譯：
 
一天，一個小男孩匆匆忙忙地走進了一家雜貨店，手里拿著一張清單。
 
“史密斯先生，你好，”他說道：“3毛3分錢一磅的咖啡，請給我13磅?！?br />  
“好的，”雜貨店老板馬上把這筆生意記了下來。
 
“還要別的什么，查理？”
 
“要的。再要27磅糖，9分錢一磅的?！?br />  
“面包要不要？還要什么？”“7磅半咸肉，3毛錢一磅的?！?br />  
“這肉是名牌的呢，還有呢？”
 
“9毛錢一磅的茶葉，給我5磅，8分錢一品脫的糖漿要11夸脫半，3毛1分錢一磅的8磅的大火腿要兩只，3毛4分錢一罐的腌核桃要5打。”
 
雜貨店老板把賬單算了出來?！澳阗I了很多東西，”他說：“你媽媽叫你現在把錢付清嗎？”
 
小男孩一面把那清楚準確的賬單放進口袋，一面說：“這和我媽沒關系，這是我自己的算術作業,我總得想辦法把它做出來！”

Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?
 
Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.
 
Father: What‘s that got to do with it?
 
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.

翻譯：
 
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝這么多水呀？
 
杰克：我剛才吃了個蘋果，爸爸。
 
爸爸：可是這跟喝水有什么關系呢？
 
杰克：我忘了洗蘋果呀。